Tuesday, November 4, 2014


Some moments upon moments in this season have been so, so hard.  In the midst of days when the '4 D's' (Demands, Defiance, Disobedience, and Disrespect) have been unending and navigating the waters of the terrible 2s mixed with the extra control and trust issues Josiah is likely dealing with in his quest for independence as a 2 year old when his trust needs were far from met in his orphanage as a 1 year old (and answers in books about how to deal with this feel empty), and when family is hundreds of miles away and when I feel the waves of inadequacy crashing around me, I want to step back and remember the moments I experience the sacredness of what God has done and how He has worked.

Like many 2 year olds, one of Josiah's favorite words is 'Mine!'.  He says it about his toys, his brother's Halloween candy, and his sister's shoes.  But the other day, as I took him in to brush his teeth before bed, he gently placed his hand on me and said 'Mine.'  Yes, Josiah, I am yours.  I am your mama.  For better or for worse, forever.  It was a sacred moment.

Last Sunday, was Orphan Sunday (to learn more about Orphan Sunday, visit their website at:  www.orphansunday.org), and we showed the official Orphan Sunday video at our church and then I went on stage for a few minutes with Josiah and shared our family's heart for adoption with the congregation.  In the video, people from many walks of life share how they were orphans, but now they belong.  It is impossible for me to watch that video and to not see Josiah standing there sharing how he was an orphan, but now he belongs.  As I walked up to the podium to share about our adoption journey, tears escaped from my eyes as the magnitude of what God has done hit me.  I was standing there, in Frederick, Maryland, in front of our church, with our little boy, who just 9 months ago was in a tiny crib in a room with 17 other cribs, 7000 miles away from his family.  Now he is here, where he belongs.  Anyone who really knows me, knows that crying in front of an audience is just not something I do.  But, I love that the moment hit me.  I love that God reached my heart with what He has done.  It was a sacred moment.

If you are in the midst of the journey and some days just seem unbearable, I pray God will give you glimpses into these sacred moments and that they will encourage you in the midst of the struggle.  I pray for the truth that Jesus gave everything to adopt you into His family will be your strength.  And I pray for your heart to remember that for all eternity, God has placed His hand on His children and says 'Mine!'

Another sacred moment:  Josiah standing in front of the lake where I ran the '15 for 150 Million' Fundraiser in his honor last Fall.

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